im 80% new jasmine...

the remainer is still the same,
the 20%, which is my intention for doing things,
this indicates how much i've chged..
cant believe dat i could change my perspective so mch,
shows how much this means to me=)
i've let go of dat word dat used to b my principle
the word dat used to b so important to me in my life..
took me long time to reli accept dat..
hmm...
although when i am asked to let go of dat,
i always felt sad for this,
cause itz sth dat i cared so mch all along,
thx though,
u've shown me dat its worth the changes dat i've made for u
time to study again since ur busy^^
love ya=)

u u u u u.......

grrrrr~~~~~~~~~~~~~
tell u in personal^^
im hungry now~~~
n also time to study aftr this^^
gambateh ya!
thx for being my motivation=p

weeeehehehe..............

waiting for tomoro to come=p
hmmm....
nervous still..
hehe...
must stay by my side when we're facing them oh...
must!!
hope got good image in front of them=P
stomach is bloating...
aiks...
must exercise dy..
hope they like me lor^^
n hope tomoro will b a happy day for us^^
am in 'excited' mood^^
tonight must drive carefully ya..
don let me worry=(
miss u^^

happy^^

talking bout these days,
i've learnt to solve prob in my thinking,
tried to solve using his ways,
especially when facing probs in handling emotions.
he told me,
sometimes ppl juz make things so complicated because they juz think on one side,
the bad side of the problem dat they r facing,
when they face prob, they juz tend to focus on it,
thinking on how hard is the prob to b solved,
but actually,
itz not reli dat tough,
itz the HUMANs who make things so hard,
actually evrything is juz so simple,
as he alwiz said,
SMALL prob can turn BIG,
so when v face prob, muz solve it as soon as possible
juz like a small lump in an organ dat have to b cured before it turns larger
it would only end up in suffering n pain if it is not bothered
=)

glad dat ytday successfully did some add maths ques,
solved it in a short time,
hehe...
i combined life concept n add maths on my fb personal msg,
think it quite suit^^
have been thinking bout it,
since it juz pop out, i wrote it on fb,
hope to get some supports on my phrase =)

juz now he intro some love songs to me,
hmm..
learnt some lessons from wat he said also,
how v think sometimes get influenced by wat v heard,
so i decided not to listen to sad love songs!
only the sweet n meaningful ones!!

itz time to study already,
hmm..hope to get some hlp from frenz on my bio subj,
at least get to knw bout wat subtopic is important,
24 days to go for spm to come,
i gotta make it,
due to some reasons..
i juz have to do my best!
face n fight against the war together~~~~
=)

finding solution...

aftr thinking so much,
hmm...
although im stil confused wit my life direction,
but i knw for one thg,
i juz aim to live a peaceful, pure n happy life..
wish to c ppl around me r happy too..
somehow..
i felt something..
if this prob goes on hanging there,
we're gonna juz end up wit hurts..
i get wat u said,
mayb to u,
im juz afraid to face the fact..
yes, i am,
i agree wit dat,
n thx for finding ways to hlp me,supporting me..
but i juz need some time to figure out bout this,
i don wan this to end up like dat..
thx for knwing how much i have chged for u,
i reli cant imagine bout our future..
i reli need some time..
thx for letting me knw wat u think about,
not hiding from me anything..
hmm..i alwiz tell myself dat,
no matter wat ppl think bad bout u,
i will stil b wit u,
i already made dat decision,
i knw how it feels when she says this n dat about u,
u knw who is 'she' dat im saying..
im bearing this feeling inside,
glad dat u know it..
hmm..i hope..
our relationship wont juz end like dat..
i trust u,
im juz thinking..
bout the consequences of wat v gonna face..
do u knw how much i wish to fulfill u?
u told me dat i don need respect when i listen to critics..
i knw wat u meant..
hmm..this feeling is so hard to b expressed..
i only knw dat...
wat im doing is for our good..
although to u...
u don think like dat..
hope one day u will get this..
i've thought of our future,
although i cant predict wat to happen,
but i feel so sad bout our difference in opinions..



pls don tell me one day..
dat we're from the different world..
i love u..

my 2010 life^^

im feeling so happy...
thinking bout the changes throughout my 17 years life..
hmm...
when i look back sometimes,
all the hurts n all the mistakes dat i've been through,
although it reli brought some hard times to pick up aftr i fell down n got injured,
but somehow..
im glad dat all dat happened to me,
how much it brought me to learn life lessons,
life is meaningful even in hard times when v struggle,
as long as v choose to b happy,
n facing the problem together wit ppl around us..

used to have the wrong perspective,
putting too much hope on others,
relying too much on them,
n it ends up in tears to adapt to times without them..
hmm...seriously learnt a lot from here..
n also ppl dat i get to know,
through sharings n spending time together..
felt very touched when i recall the past..
so touched until tears reli dropped out of my eyes...
itz so worth the tears coz it brought me up^^
reli wanna say thx to all around me..
thx for being there for me...
wanna say here dat...
jasmine is not like d old jasmine anymore!=)
lots to share n i have no time for now,
will share more here,
hope dat ppl around me will c the changes in me n learn together wit me^^
i love my life...=)

jas

special mood=*

im so feeling in love now..=p
especially aftr listening to jojo's 'forever in my life' song..
such a nice song..

hmm...nowadays felt sch life is happy,
seeing my frenz start studying..
some perhaps tot dat it is too late,
but i knw dat even the last month counts!
hope to c all my frenz doing well together wit me,
we're gonna finish this race well!
i believe so=D
having some planning in mind now..
hope evrythg goes as we wish^^
don wanna think bout other things now,
it's juz time for me to focus 1st
n being there for evryone who needs me=)
thx for evryone who cares for me n alwiz being there for me^^
i wouldnt forget y'all..
hope to keep in touch in life alwiz!

loves,
jas

thx....

shouldnt view dat blog actually...
feeling sry for both..
hmm..
ytday u asked me bout going there wit u..
i felt as though im not courageous enuf to do dat..sometimes....
anyway,i knw i gotta face it n give u an answer..
i knw dat wat im doing is right..
although it may hurt their feelings
or i may drop lots of tears juz bcoz of this..
this might b a suffering feeling...
but u reminded me one thing,
is dat,as v struggle,v struggle for a little while,
but will enjoy aftr dat..
hmm..i got a dream for future..
hoping for it,
wishing it to come true..
but will keep inside my heart i guess=)
hope to walk in life wit u happily learning together...
seeing u putting efforts in ur work n studies,
reli pushed me to study as well..
thx for ur support n love alwiz...

thx babe..=)

u thought me a lot..
i've been thinking bout the changes in me lately..
my thinking has chged,
influenced by u=/
i seemed to b a naughty girl again,
coz i spend time chating wit u......
didnt listen to my mom command......
seemed bad from d outside,
but u knw dat how i've changed on d inside..
when i tot of how bad i am,
it always discouraged me,
but u alwiz encouraged me n gave me the confidence to b wit u..
made me feel itz worth trusting u..
thx!!!
im reli happy being wit u..=)
cant wait for dat day to learn wit u together...
i'll keep our secret..
one day ppl will c our achievements n feel proud of wat we've done!
thx for being the one who can accept my evrything..
thx for telling me of my value in ur eyes=)
trust u!
lets do our parts together now..=)
n wait till dat day....
u knw i knw=)

confused....

i saw dat blog...
saw wat u wrote there..
hmm...thx..
but i felt sad aftr viewing it..
don wait for me k?
im not worth ur love for me bcoz of my identity..
sry...
this is reli heartfelt pain..
i understand ur situation dat time anyway,
datz y i've nvr been mad at u..
i used to think dat u might turn bck n ask to get bck last time,
not to deny dat,
but u didnt..
datz how i lost hope on waiting for dat day to come..
thx for hlping me to learn this..
accepting the fact..

im having my new life now,
no means here..
thx for ur concern,
u can text me whenever u want..
anyway we're frenz forever..
no worries for anybody..
i didnt want to view the blog actually..
i knew i might end up crying..
i almost..
itz not bcoz im holding on to it..
but...
sometimes i reli wished this has nvr happen in my life..
at least i can trust another person more..
don cry for me..
im not worth ur tears..
i don want u to cry for me..
there'z more gurls outside much better than me...
u will soon find one,
just wait..
i believe it would b one who is much better than me..
best wishes for u..

don worry bout me,
my life is good now..
i can still smile happily=)
take care..
frenship forever

yes!!! another few more hours^^

im waiting..................=p
yeh~~ltr can meet him at depastry chef^^
n before dat can intro him to my family^^
happy happy!
hope itz not gonna b disappointed though=/
hmm..
my stomach is bloating!!!
hope ltr will look pretty in his eyes^^
awaiting..............................................



no matter wat it takes, i have faith dat i can trust in him,
aftr talking on the phone dat day being mumbled by him,
i've learnt n recognized wat type of person he is,
makes me like him more than usual...hehe..
but i knw he's definitely a trustable guy^^
aftr talking on the ph dat day,
i've made a decision to turst him in all dat he does,
n i don wanna hurt him in watever i do, say n think..
i juz don wan dat to happen to him...
hope he trust me as mch as i trust him even aftr wat v chat on dat day=)


continue waiting in excitement for dat time...^^
waiting for u^^
bye~~~~gonna do some exercise dy~=)

im juz so desperate to write stg here..lol

tot of it ytday..
hmm..not gonna write here=)
try to focus on studies while waiting for him to look for me evry night^^
kinda not having enough of sleep nowadays coz v chat late at night=/
but worth it..=)
feel happy chating wit him..
and another fren^^
sharing wit me wat he learnt..
love learning n sharing wit otherz together^^
gambateh!
all who have been good to me!
glad dat today im bck to study aftr so many days imagining days aftr spm
lol...
told him bout wat i imagined=/
hope it will come true..
he told me dat promises r juz nth if it cant b fulfilled..
n he didnt promise me anythg^^
good^^
like this kind of mentality..
i learnt a lot=)
................................................
mch to say but rather juz keep inside=)

once again,
thx for all who cares for me..^^

let by gone be by gone=)

i've done my best...
in evrythg..
for the past
now itz time for myself to b happy..
of course,doing the right thing=)
i knw whom i trust is trustable...
so yea..for the past...
i'll juz treat all of them my frenz still=)

n yea............
studies!!
getting more nervous..
need more preparation!!
today start doing more on bio subj 1st..
reli don get those systems n functions..
but i knw i can do it..

hope wont juz dream on but put into action..=)
gambateh bai fan!!
take care of urself n recover as soon as possible ya?=)

mmmmmmm.....gotta push ady....=(

im nervous...
i seriously am...
i gotta catch up those dat i don get n knw the technics to answer..
hmm...
today kinda happy at sch..
i found my mood to study bio dy..
today i wanna do my best in studies..
wish to score well in trial n spm=)
thx for all dat studie n revise wit me,
v improve together whenever v solve the ques together=)
love y'all!

i learnt a lot nowadays..:)

jun jie called me n v had some chating on sat n mon

he told me many thgs..

although aftr hearing those..

i find it hard to trust ppl around me..

he said..guys who made promise r juz say for fun only..

they can make promise, evryone can, but who can reli do it?

hmm..i knw itz true..

but i trusted...him..

to me, he reli tried his best to fulfill wat he promised me.

although yes,i cried a lot for the promise he didnt fulfill..

but i stil think dat wat he said, he reli meant it..

guess he's the last one dat i will trust the promises..=)

i still trust u,
although ur not sharing evrythg wit me like previously anymore
i trust u as a fren,hope u reli treat me the same..
im willing to share wit u bout the joy i experience,
i don expect frm u anythg,
i wish dat u will have the right perspective in life only..
dat is all i wan from u..

jun jie told me dat the world is a realistic community..

he said guys sometimes love a person wit wrong motives..

those dat i reli don like to hear..

since then..

my mood wasnt reli good for 2 days ady..


talking bout sharing my joyfulness..

i wondered today..

did i couple wit somebody to help them or out of my love?

i knw im not superior..

cant hlp ppl dat easily..

especially bout those dat i share..

aftr this relationship ends,

i knew i cried becoz i have to juz wish him n let go..

evrytime in my heart i tell myself dat i wish him all the best..

i worried bout his future sometimes even as while i was wit him..

im afraid if he will b influenced by other bad girls in future..

i dunno..

i feel dat the reason dat i be wit him is dat i don wan him to b influenced...?

hmm..anyway..he cant c my heart now..

not expecting him to come bck,

juz wish dat he is willing to share wit me anythg n listen to my sharing

mayb i expressed my words wrongly b4 this..

saying dat im afraid of disappointments..

mayb dat scared him..

i dunno?juz don b cold to me k?
as a fren,i juz wish to share wit u..=)

i realized this ytday,

when i shared wit him in my text,

he didnt reply...

i felt sad..

but i shared the same text wit jun jie,

he replied me n feel happy dat i share wit him,

i felt so happy aftr seeing the text..

i guess,mayb i juz wanna share wit ppl the joy dat i have..

thx to those who appreciate my sharing:)

this morning~~~

went to MP sports centre ply badm..

xia shui...lol..

i think those who ply beside will have to b afraid of being smashed juz bcoz of my hit..

lol...

badm plying skills worse than usual..

mayb nowadayz drink cold drinks sometimes+ didnt exer much + didnt eat mch as well

whther it affects anot..

stil..i gotta improve skills in badm..

>.<

n studies......

ltr gotta drive to tuition for a.math replacement class..

hmm...kinda my fav subj nowadays=)

another 3 months time.....

meeda push!!!

n say...I CAN I CAN!

wish dat nowadays don get tired too easily..

don wan my sleeping time affect studies...=(

much to say=)

Lately~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i felt so mch bttr aftr sharing wit mom,
kinda many days didnt post here..=)
mom said can hang out wit my frenz as long as she knws who i hang out wit.
finally no more guilt in my heart..
i love like this, don like doing things behind anybody..
especially against parents..=(
now finally can b a good girl..
doing wat i like to do in a way dat makes me feel entirely happy^^
i love my family n frenz n God!

yesterday~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

say bye bye to HBO, MTV hits, CNN, nickelodeon, disney channel...
those dat i watched!!=(
astro cut off since 19th August 2010!!
my favourite movies.....................
argh~~~~~~~~~~~~
no more........

recently have not been taking photos until this day!!
got new pics in phone waiting to upload..
hehe^^
got 8 i think..
but will pick 6 or 5..
hope got good comments..^^

today~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

itz the 1st time i drived home so early!
usually wait for cars to clear out..
surprisingly vry few of cars..
aftr seeing many cars in front,
i straight U-turn my car to d other opposing lane..
quite gan jiong but learnt experience!
im daring....hahahah!!
siao siao...lol..
but....my baby got a little hurt!!!..
itz when i reach below nova there turning right too fast
the tyre hitted the divider a bit...
sam tong lor...my baby....
=(
luckily my baby is alrite...
today i drove quite shaky,
i mean in terms of shifting gear,
the gear got a bit stucked..
hope itz alrite ltr when i drive to tuition...=)


hmm..i kinda miss hanging out for a movie nowadays...
=(
i reli miss the times eating popcorns,drinking soft drink n watching movies in cinemas....
i wanna watch the new movie..
soon tesco cinema will b opening..
bro n i wanna watch,
hope can watch dat movie by shia la beouf..
duno wat it calls but i knw got this handsome,it muz b a nice movie...
like shia la beouf!!!=)
awaiting for dat movie~~~~~

mmmmmHmmmmm...im happy=)

i tot of many thgs today..(at 1st la)
=)
i almost cried becoz i felt reli reli vry stressed out..
the most dat i concern is driving..
my driving was dangerous yest..
luckily my bro n i were saved=)
thank God again!!

hmm...juz before writing this blog..
i tot of one thg dat i should b happy of,
my mom promised me dat aftr spm,
she'll allow me to do bracers!
i've been waiting for it for so long!!!
although it's not dat nice for few years,
n i would like to bear wit it..
hmm..paiseh...share here..
hehe..

today i drove safely..
kinda helped me felt happier aftr ytday's incident
at least it comforts me^^
i hope i wont make big mistake again like dat..
thank God still!!!!
i said im ALIVE!!!!!!!!
or else..choi!

i found my mistake n luckily i can learn from it b4 anythg bad happens to me n family,
i muz b a good driver to ensure my family is safe wit me!
+ those who may need me to fetch nex time...
i said MAY ya...
i cant take the responsibility of ur lives!
plz don gimme resposiblility to fetch y'all go anywhere..
i cant take it..
im juz a new driver..

feel so happy^^
refreshing on how i start learning to drive..
how my mom n bro trained me aftr got my P...
until today!!
i can drive myself to tuition n sch dy!!
although i cant simply go other place,
but im so lucky^^
hmmm....
i think im d only student in this sch to drive manual car as a girl..
hehe.....
but stil,
all pls pray for me,
dat evry journey i go on the road will b safe^^
i pray for you all too..=)
especially those dat i concern mch..

to all drivers~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
drive safely ya...

up..down...up..down...yesterday..(my mood)

cried a bit yest..
itz when i shared wit 2 guys bout my feelings,
when some particular words irritated me,
tears juz came down like dat..
but it lasted for a while only becos i don wanna cry anymore..
n i knw im fine..
hmm..i felt..actually crying once in a whike to let go,
the feeling is quite comfortable..
especially when i released how i felt,
whether by complaining not fair,or telling myself dat itz for our good=)

yest chated wit jun jie,
i wondered still..
can i trust his words?
but i knw even if he's telling frm true heart..
i wont accept him still for now,
itz bttr to remain frenz..
evrythg comes more natural..
foreout, i don reli dare to put myself into all these ady..(for now)


nowadays start to drive car to sch starting on last thur onwards..=)
quite happy..
hehe...don needa walk home again..woohoo...
love ma babe...
nowadays...my car has been my 'baby'..
feel itz cute,wanna take gud care of my car..
n washing car has become my hobby^^
love it so mch..
hmm...should call it a 'she'^^
im juz crazy..
emm...
i hope this mentality is normal=/
coz....
i think i love my car as though itz a nissan fairlady!
although itz not a big car,
but im privileged enuf to have a car..
reli appreciate it..
anyway itz gonna stick to me for 7 years at least..
i will take care of it vry well..^^
hope nobody's stupid mistake n less cautious hurts 'her' again>.<


hmm...talking bout car..sad thg to say...
didnt even realise dat my car got a little part concaved dy...
dunno who did this to my car..
but i knw it muz b at desaparkcity..!
stupid fella...
open door don open gently..
hit my car n happened like dat..
grrr...
i reli hate it...
itz not dat i didnt drive well,
but the stupid fella did this to my car..
but of coz...
itz bttr for others' doing mistake than i doing mistake..
a good reason to thank God..^^

my mood is kinda down now..

aftr he replied me in his status at fb,
i felt dat im like disturbing him..
i dunno..
i juz feel down aftr reading it..
itz not his fault..
mayb he's juz busy..
but...
i reli feel like crying..
i don think i should text him anymore until he text me himself..
i should not disturb his life..
actually..this feeling is reli hard to let go..
used to love him so mch..
but..it ended..
i reli gotta accept dat..
mayb i wont view his fb anymore..
mayb i juz got to forget how he looks,how he speaks,how he jokes wit me..
it reli hurts...
i loved u,mr A..
but i cant love u anymore..
guess this is the 1st time i confess this in my blog..
i knw i sounds emo..
used to keep this in my heart n only share to my close ones..
n..
this may b the one n only blog i confess..

ytday i tot of asking u out..
mayb let u b the 1st one i fetched except family..
but i didnt..
at the end..i fetched another fren..
mr.k..
but...lets not talk bout mr.k..
i drove vry nervously ytday..n dangerous..
i dunno wat my mind was thinking..
luckily he thought me..
n today..
my mom scolded me coz i was blur while driving..
didnt stop at the junction..
didnt shift gear properly..
didnt use the right gear..

alrite..
im not gonna say how bad it is..
i wan my confidence back..
i will not cry for it anymore..
ltr gonna drive to tuition..
gotta ensure good driving though..
so dat's all..
although i guess no one will view my blog so often..
but i felt bttr now sharing here..

ur surely happy there,aren't u?=)
wishing u all the best in life ya..
God bless u^^

hmm..how should i react wit wat i've heard?

came to knw stg which i didnt knw for so long..
kinda shocked when i heard it
but dat was reli someone dat im vry concerned bout last yr.(k)
juz dunno y..
hmm..i hope im not hoping in it again..=)
felt that this person has been faired to me
when he realized dat im not the one,
he told me in a polite way
although i revealed this truth today the exact reason
but i reli appreciate him vry much for his concern for my feelings
thanks k.
although it didnt end up as i wanted at 1st,
but thanks dat u hid the truth from me,
i feel better to know it by myself than u letting me know=)

n today..
i found some good qualities in one of my fren,
we werent dat close but v alwiz recess together nowadays,
aftr sharing wit her n listening to her sharings,
i felt dat she's a caring person n a good fren.
actually i wonder, y didnt her close frens appreciate her?
feel so pity her for being abandoned by others.
hmm..but i feel happy dat can hav a fren like her,
hope she's alwiz cheerful=)
n wish to understand her more^^
friends r precious,
wish dat all of my close frenz n i can alwiz keep in touch
(even though aftr v graduated from secondary sch)=/

my eye has finally recovered a little..

hmm..these few days i didnt allow myself to cry..

but..stil at least a little..

sometimes i juz feel like showing to ppl dat i can go over this

it hurts though..=/

i don wan to make the lump more on my eye..

it doesnt make me feel comfortable..

dat is y i skipped sch today..

today..i cried a lot

1st is my driving..

i didnt drive as well as i expected

and my mom was juz correcting me but i wanted to give up out of my impatience..

i dunno how to reverse car according to the side mirrors..

datz scary..luckily itz at the basement there..

aftr i cried for dat i sudden;y tot of this person..

hmm..dunno y..

i felt dat i havent let go..

stil wanted to ask him dat question..

his class gonna start soon at dat time so yea...

didnt ask him n told him to text me when free..

i guess i don need to ask him now..=/

wanted to ask dat becoz i wanna give up on hoping in him..

anyway...juz over emo at dat time..

ACCEPT!!i alwiz tell myself like this..=/

i knw i can..surely i can!

i juz wanna b a tougher person n don give up in times of disappointment

hope this applies to him too..=)

omg...itz so embarassing..

grrr....
today i almost fell down again..
my leg hit a divider tiang outside the nova apartment guard house..
some guys saw me n frightened...
omg~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
dunno should laugh or wat???
my leg is painful..
some skin peeled off here>.<
arhhh~~~~~~~~~
i was soooooooooooooooooooooo stupid..
didnt look at the road n walking while i was busying to eat..

advice to all: DONT EAT WHEN YOU WALK!!
plz...i beg y'all..
look at where ur walking..
nvr again will i walk n eat..T.T

moving on being a wise learner=)

as a learner in life i faced some trials....
sometimes lost smtg n it is hard to let go sometimes..
cried a lot for this..
sometimes tend to blame this n dat with wonderings and reasonings
somehow i knw dat..itz isnt ppl's fault or our fault,
neither the planners for our life..
there is alwiz a reason behind this..
sometimes in disappointments,
v alwiz react in a way dat v pity ourselves for wat v r facing, emo all the time, tend to alwiz think how bad is the world n itz ppl..
or even try to avoid it or force ourselves to b happy n still try to b TOUGH..
but there's a fact behind it..it doesnt work coz the thought is WRONG!

my wrong reactions to disappointment was alwiz...
avoid it,tell myself dat i can only cry for few dayz,
thought dat i can feel better by thinking bout other things..
but it has never been a CHANGE
the grief is still inside becoz i was not accepting it
another thing is..if i never face it, i can never forget it.

thought a lot nowadayz..n i've got a lot of answers
it all ended wit the same conclusion
juz FACE IT, ACCEPT IT n find the RELIEF!
im now a better person,
thinking like a grown up person
wat that has gone be by gone..
this is surely sth meaningful bcos v have learnt a great lesson=)
nowadayz i can tend to chat wit my frenz,
fooling around wit them happily juz like the jasmine in old dayz
dat doesnt mean i did not accept the fact dat i've lost smtg
but i have tend to appreciate wat i have n go for the goals for my future..
i can still move on!

i knw i should not hate myself out of disappointment,
it doesnt signifies dat im useless, hopeless, or im a nobody to others
i knw itz not the ending
itz juz a beginning of disciplining myself,
growing to b a more mature and right thinking person^^
life is precious n i m enjoying evry moment in wat i do now=)





this is wat i meant by my statement 'i love the way i looked'
because i don hate myself n i knw dat i have my good personalities..
best thing dat i ever learnt in life for 17 years living
i love my life now and alwayz!

im sorry bout the misunderstanding..

tq for dat v can share today

n u told me bout wat ur facing..

sorry dat even i have been misunderstanding bout u for so long

2day is ur day..

i finally understand dat i was wrong

i cried when v came bck home

cried it out from my heart

i felt so sorry bout this vry mch..

i dunno whether im crying for both incidence at the same time..

i still feel like crying now though

i wanna call u now..

im gonna share wit u bout wat im feeling inside

hope ur not sleeping now=/

disappointed..

speechless bout dat..

sometimes i wonder,

should i b angry of dat person?

or should i consider wat had happened to this person?

mayb juz duno watz right?

or juz being disturbed?

quite confused

wanted to tell dat but didnt at last..

both r respectful ppl to us..

wish there will b a turning point for this person

hope things get better

hope evryone's hapi here..



im not gonna think bout this any more
but patience is to b tested for us
n i knw v can breakthrough this..

staying positive^^

today is BI n BM paper1 exam,

kinda happy wit it

whther i score well or not

i juz felt satisfied wit the ideas i had in mind to complete the essays=)

sth to b happy of^^

tomoro will b phys2 n bio 3

i knw im gonna do it

felt relax

this is reli the feeling dat i wanted=)

i've found myself!

love myself^^

wa love add maths!!!

love add maths since 2 dayz b4..
since the day i start practicing on doing 'log' dat chap!
finally can solve it!!
love it love it!!xd
hope this time can score better than just passing=)

talking bout yesterday
scared me to death..
was like talking to myself when sitting on the bed
n refreshing wat happened yesterday
didnt know i was sitting on my cell ph
suddenly it vibrated
n a msg sent to me from my ex
i accidently called him
was like talking bout things he shouldnt hear
tot he heard it
phew~~'God has eyes'
xdxd
he didnt hear...^^
duno wat will happen if he heard it:S
panjang umur!haha..

JAN 2010 at genting=)

alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5461681969443551458" />

2010 snap shots=P

satisfaction:p

having good mood today wit two good reasons!!!(to me la)

1stly---
for the 1st time
studying at bio lab n paying attention to wat teacher teaching us!!
[instead of chit-chating like usual]

this is reli the 1st time i pay attention in bio lesson for form5^^

usually distracted coz cant listen wat teacher teaching due to one major reason

which is d only thing dat our class among the 3 science streams would do

is MAKING NOISE~~

coz v r the ex-SEPAKAT students!!!

so today wat i successfully did was a record-breaking event!

2ndly---
successfully didnt eat at canteen today during recess~~>.<

tot of eating at 1st

but no one acc me to eat at canteen at dat time

so didnt eat

cant WAI SEK:p

nvm lorrrrrrrrrrrrrr




NEXT ~~

today is the 2nd time i sit rapid bus~~

seriously wei..

the 1st time was last yr 1/4,the april fool day

n also 4 person's birthday celebration

today polly asked me to sit rapid wit her

woohoo~~don need to walk so mch^^

n not so sweaty n sticky~~

btw~~~~~~~

I AMMMMMMMMMMMMMM STICKY & SWEATY now!!

kk...
end of story:p (bad ending)
go bath now~byeeeeeeeeeeee

wat happen......

wat happen to me?
y do i have to feel so bothering nowadays?
moody n all...
trying to look for myself?
where am i?
i wan myself back..
wat has been going on?
where is my confidence...
pls come back..
am i doing the right thing?
somehow wondering..
who am I actually..
y have i been so undecisive nowadayz?
hate myself sumtimes..
did many wrong things in the past,even for now..
i lost myself..

i muz score well in add maths!!!

ytday in tuition~~

teik nan,guo lng n me bet each other

who score the lowest mark muz treat 100+

but for me is special~~

if i score better than them i make them buy me birthday present!!!!

10th of MAY!!

don u ever forget!!

xdxdxd
lol...the mosquitos r standing their chances to bite my leg now~~
stupid mosquito..
itz itchy now
kk
bttr sign out n go to my room n study!!
today's subj:ADD MATHS,sj n physics

wat mood am i having?hapi?sad?wori?serious?xd

woooo~~
found dat i lost a little weight~~
vry hapi^^
feel satisfied out of my "hard" work
=)
actually itz not hard
im enjoying in doing it
got mood to go outing dy^^
tonight going to mom's client daughter n son wedding dinner
reli special wedding
one is marry to ppl, one is marry ppl
vry nice timing=)
oh yea~~nowadayz i love Justin Bierber's song
especially "baby" n another song which he sings wit Jay Sean
smtg like "mini mini mini more"??
dunno la
juz love the two songs
vry sweet love songs~~hehe

didnt post for a week?
so now post smtg here~
however~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i gotta study nowadayz
exam coming...
i'll do my best this time
coz i knw i got strong reasons to make sure i score well in exam
>.<
n i knw..
i can do it...
i must score well this time
although feel a little stressed out
but i can still relax chating wit ppl
my entertainments: mp3,texting,talking on the ph,online,blog :)
hope wont neglect my family n frenz
coz i care for y'all~~
itz march now
i also knw dat i must study hard from now coz time is not gonna wait for me
hope evrythg will b juz like wat we wish

things dat i muz do is:
score well in evry exam

im going for it~
muz b reli serious in studies nowadays
other personal thgs r to b kept in heart n share wit ppl close to me oni^^
so..i think datz all!=)
hope can hav enuf time to study wat i have missed out la!

hope evrybody will b serious this time(as i knw it wouldnt)
n..
hope laziness will not influence my studies again

im goin crazy~~~

totally run out of words now~~

but today is a sweet day=)

not to deny it..

but...yea..

xd

y do i say dat??

secrets**=)

this time reli squeeze my brain juice to write this blog

coz all i wanna say is PERSONAL~~~

>.<

oh yea~~

ytday was a sport day for sch

ran 4x400m wit other 3 partners

haiz..

this time stil didnt get trophy for running

wasted~~

but reli got no energy to run>.<

juz glad for one thing...

we're not the LAST=)

although v felt kinda disappointed

but stil..

we've done our best=)

so to me...

this is d only last yr to run

n itz the 1st time for me to run a whole round of the stadeum track

good la~~

=)

vry speechless now

gotta sleep dy~~

somebody slept~~

n now my family also slept

time for me too=)

but this time i sign out wit a wish..

special one=)

wish dat evry single thing dat i do will make ppl happy!

juz...dunno la..

i appreciate ppl around me

so hope they r happy!!

datz all

sayonara

miss independent------panda mui

nowadays im not miss independent anymore

coz bro gonna come bck!!!

n....hehehe..

secrets*

n................

i became panda!!

need sleep!~~

polly kacau me

xdxd

~~~~~~~~~~~

ytday was a vry busy n quite tiring day

headache + no energy..

slept late on the day b4

thinking too mch~~

got no mood to study juz bcoz of smth..

secrets*

my allergy is coming bck~~

worrying of having more scars dy~~

mayb one of the reason is dat i did washings

n sweat a lot..

hope aftr my allergy healed it'll not leave any scars..

hate scars nowadayz!!

i had a lot dy!!>.<

felt bored 2day..

like don hav mood to do anythg plus tired

y am i so moody????

>.<

coz of YOU...

hope it would not happen at this time

getting worry bout this for many days..

forget bout it..

nowadayz alwiz got wierd comments frm frenz bout me~~

lol....

they say i look sad n stressed.

actually yea...

2day Polly massaged me...

my shoulders r burdening me..

itz reli pain..

Polly said i looked hapi in the morning but sad in d aftrnoon..

aiks..
probably its true..

i hav been thinking bout dat for like few days~~

hope it wouldnt affect my studies~~

UNTITLED**

1st post dat im posting wit sadness

feel as though wanna burst in tears but cant

don wanna talk bout the reason

there's a lot to tell

but it is true

dat

being TOUGH isnt as easy as tears drop off from the eyes..

this feeling is kinda making me suffering

letting it go is bttr than keeping it

as usual~~

sometimes the best solutions of letting go the sadness is by this way

my patience is gonna b vry limited..

thank God for one thing

this is gonna end soon

muscle pain......

ytday in the evening muscle starts to pain

which i dunno y...

lol...

coz evry week also exercise

sumore last week physical training

n ytday juz played..

a day dat almost evrywhere got pain..

haiz..

im exshausted~~

think 2day i ply badm for the longest time

4 hours continuously!!!!!!!!!

juz kua jiong a bit only

did resting also

quite fun plying match

ESPECIALLY THE WINNING PART

ahaha...

Arthur vry geng so can win=)

hope dat i can improve more in badm>.<

my toe was vry pain today

feel like as though my 4th toe nail is coming out like last time

i think evrytime i ply skipping rope surely got sumthg like this

toe surely feel pain

but nvm=)

I just love badm so mch^^

cant hang out wit frenz dy.........................>.<

only aftr spm..sad case

n also driving license!!!

awaiting for dat~~

don wanna trouble my mum to fetch me here n there dy especially these days

mum n sis got sick on thur

luckily they r alright now...

days without bro is tough~~~~

hope 14th March quickly come

i wan my bro back vry badly!!

will update sumore when im free n not lazy xd

kk,goodbye all frenz~~^^

Another week to CNY

bought a white dress for CNY

hmm..

this year don wanna buy so many clothes

scare nex year will change dressing style

so save the money for future bttr xdxd

guys.........future is important!!~~~~~~~~~~~

xdxd

hmm...wat i wan for CNY is more for badm
[the percentages stand for how much i desire]



1. a pair of shoes for badm=)------80%
2. a badm bag--------------------70%
3. shuttlecourt-------------------60%
4.another shorts for badm-------50%

1st priority would b a pair of shoes....
waiting for bro cum bck then can ask him to bring me go n buy good quality shoes>.<
waiting for ya bro!

2nd week of badminton training

ytday was x-country for sch

not interested in running dy

my heart is all towards-----------badminton

hahaha~~~

ytday Arthur trained us how to serve the ball

n also the basic 2 steps,4 steps n shadow

quite tiring

guess i didnt sleep enough.

then v ply like competition

Arthur said im lack of confidence while plying

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

today goin' to ply badm wit dad n frenz

hope can improve more

n hope the badm court is opened

now awaiting for Chili to come back home to ply badm wit us

u bttr come back in half an hour time, Chili!!!

WooHoo~~~~~~~~~~~

finally found a website which has nice games..

originated from juz CLICKING my pinball game the "click for more games"

many games~~

love puzzle games=)

Schooling days~~~

juz came bck not long

found dat the dim sum dat mum steamed is full of antsssssssssssssss

lol...

wasted!!CANT EAT ady

nowadays kinda feeling abandoned at sch

but itz ok lah..

try to comfort myself to b happy=)

now wondering one thing

no, actually two

tomorrow going for badm training,

dunno mum can fetch anot

n then nex mon dunno mum allow me to go MV wit clsmates anot>.<

if cant i also dun wanna feel sad ady

kinda prepared for "negations"

so cant go also cant do anythg la

if cant then wish they enjoy happily lor=)






FRENZ,

whether y'all c this or not,

but i appreciate y'all

do wish dat can hang out wit y'all at MV on mon

but if cant then wish y'all enjoy lor:)

wee~~=)

new mp3!

although itz not expensive lah...

but nowadays i seemed to abandon my phone

lol...

DAYs WITHOUT BROTHER

called myself miss independent coz i cant depend on any1 nowadayz

bro is not wit us for 3 months(ns):

nobody fetch me home aftr sch like usual

nobody is free to fetch me to tuition evrytime

nobody hlp me to order food when i don hav the courage to

nobody scold me when i upset my mum

nobody ask me to eat more rice

juz juz juz...............nobody lah...............

lol...miss him...wish he's here

wish dat time pass so quickly dat he can cum bck earlier=)

love ya bro!

ANNOUNCEMENT!!!

my bro is a MAN!! 22nd of Jan----happy birthday big young man!!